Offensive posts

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Criticism is fine, insults never. Full support re future approach from this member. :thumbsup:

PS How many moderators are there and whatever the number is that enough?
 
I've always found this forum brilliant with very few offensive posts, so thanks to Jim and the other Mods for keeping it that way. :thumbsup:
 
Mr Tidy said:
I've always found this forum brilliant with very few offensive posts, so thanks to Jim and the other Mods for keeping it that way. :thumbsup:
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Ah damn! I've been ticking off names to see who got banned and you still popped up. :rofl:
 
Having been on here since just after its inception I can only thank you again for the time and effort you put in. The forum has been one of the big pleasures of my Zed ownership over the last 15 of years! It is a great, friendly and knowledgeable place that naturally self police’s over time but it is a shame you have had to take your own time to sort those that take things too far!
 
enuff_zed said:
Mr Tidy wrote: ↑Tue Jun 27, 2023 7:57 pm
I've always found this forum brilliant with very few offensive posts, so thanks to Jim and the other Mods for keeping it that way.
Ah damn! I've been ticking off names to see who got banned and you still popped up.
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And there was me thinking you seemed like a nice guy! :P
 
@spectre Jim, having banned numerous people on the babybmw forum, I understand what goes into running a forum and what 99.9% of the public never see.

You could have moved the banned posts behind a paywall and cashed in on it though 🤣

Well done for taking action though.
 
Nanu said:
PS How many moderators are there and whatever the number is that enough?
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I think there are three including Jim. And yes it is enough IMO.
This forum has an average demographic of 50-something year old men. I only know of two ladies, one is not a regular contributor anymore. 99% of the time there is no need for any moderation, which is what makes the forum so good and popular. On the rare occasion it is necessary it is moderated, but fairly and sensibly.

This episode has resulted in temporary bans for a few, not permanent bans (which many forums and social media outlets would do). It's more like an old-fashioned 'club' than a forum.

Over-moderation and over 'house-keeping' has killed many car internet forums over the years. There are very few good ones left IME, which is down mainly to the demographic and their attitudes. People of a certain age don't necessarily want to 'do' facebook groups, or instagram, etc.

All in my opinion and from what I see! :thumbsup:

Car forums are my ONLY form of social media and this one is the best by far; partly due to the people and partly due to the admin.
 
Thanks Jim, appreciate your efforts. People need to remember it’s a car forum to chat about the things we love - Z4s. Who cares if you think differently to others, can’t we just agree to disagree and rejoice in the fact we love the varying types of this 2 seaters bundle of fun? Life is too short to be arguing with strangers on a car forum FFS.
 
When I left the forces, having known only that from the age of 17, I discovered that the military sense of humour was just not understood by 'civvies' being based mainly on sarcasm and taking the p$ss out of others before they did so unto you.
It did cause a few misunderstandings at first! (Massive understatement! :roll: )
However, I learnt to moderate my humour, reduce the p$ss taking and generally think for a second before I fired from the hip.
Over time I got better at judging my audience and hopefully now I get away with it most of the time.

My point being that, in the main, the big hoo-haa's on this forum seem to stem from the initial commenter misjudging his audience and then, instead of being the bigger person and backing down with an apology, they react to the shirty reply and before you know it we're all at Defcon 1.
All it takes is a moment to stop, think and be humble, and hopefully now that lesson may have been learned?
 
Tbh I don't agree with Pondy being banned. Ok he is ff'ing annoying and is a fen dweller but underneath it all... hmm...yeah...anyway. Have you sold the Missus car yet? :D :rofl: :thumbsup:
 
enuff_zed said:
When I left the forces, having known only that from the age of 17, I discovered that the military sense of humour was just not understood by 'civvies' being based mainly on sarcasm and taking the p$ss out of others before they did so unto you.
It did cause a few misunderstandings at first! (Massive understatement! )
However, I learnt to moderate my humour, reduce the p$ss taking and generally think for a second before I fired from the hip.
Over time I got better at judging my audience and hopefully now I get away with it most of the time.

My point being that, in the main, the big hoo-haa's on this forum seem to stem from the initial commenter misjudging his audience and then, instead of being the bigger person and backing down with an apology, they react to the shirty reply and before you know it we're all at Defcon 1.
All it takes is a moment to stpo, think and be humble, and hopefully now that lesson may have been learned?
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Similar but I spent 20 odd years working on building sites of one form or another. Two things I learned pretty quickly was not to take ANYTHING personally and not to be offended by ANYONE.
 
enuff_zed said:
When I left the forces, having known only that from the age of 17, I discovered that the military sense of humour was just not understood by 'civvies' being based mainly on sarcasm and taking the p$ss out of others before they did so unto you.
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I can understand this - and after a close family funeral where I was amongst the group of four of the last of “our “ generation ie the oldest and most likely to pop off, my cousin who was 15/16 when he joined the RAF sixty years ago, came to tell us he was taking odds as which one of us would not be having a beer at the next funeral Do! :rofl:

My brother could not understand his black humour!
 
Interesting feedback from all, I appreciate it… Here’s a little insight into my thinking…

I started this forum in 2007 and from the start I aimed to keep it as open as possible. I had been a member of several forums where the admin and mods ruled with an iron fist and a massive ban-hammer… I hated it.. it was like small man syndrome, treating grown adults like kids!

I know this may be controversial, but there seems to be a need nowadays for everywhere to be a safe space and everyone to walk on eggshells so as not to offend… personally moderating a forum on that basis is both tiresome and it sucks the life out of it.

That said, my approach has perhaps been a little too laid back and resulted in things going a bit too far.

What I want is people to be free to say what they want, joke around (within limits) and have fun while maintaining respect for each other.

We went several years without banning anyone, and I really hope that we can consider this a reboot and nobody will get banned again. I don’t want people to feel like I am over-moderating or turning this place into a creche like a lot of other forums.

Thanks again for the feedback guys!
 
There is obviously a world of difference between banter of people who know each other in an army unit vs strangers talking online, the same types of conversations are going to go south very quickly in the latter.

I was an admin and mod on 350z-uk and I dont think people realise the pains you go through to sort stuff out, and you never seem to please everyone. Trying to balance libertarianism vs authoritarianism. Most of the time if those getting involved just took a breath and stood in the other persons shoes for ten seconds the argument would quickly go away and no intervention needed. Is all the advice I would give.

Just for fun...

Someone+is+wrong+on+internet.png
 
I've only been a member on here for a little while and to me it seems a friendly place with nice people helping other nice people with good advice and cheap parts. I mostly enjoy the banter and don't generally find it offensive although my sense of humour is quite dark sometimes. Only once have I asked someone to stop being awful and that was because he was becoming very offensive towards a female forum member about her car which then got out of hand. That really did become very vile and not suitable and completely out of place on here. As I have said before this is my happy place and may it stay this way. Thank you sp3ctre for all you do to provide such a decent forum for us all. :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
 
So I was one of the people banned. I don’t disagree with my ban as I reacted to someone who has been a constant thorn with abusive posts including racist, homophonic and antisemitic posts. I shouldn’t have reacted and I apologise for that. I don’t agree that the main culprit got the same ban as the 2 of us who responded.

Just in my defence. I had messaged the moderator over a year ago about this person and the reply I got “I’m staying out of it”.
Said instigator has had fallouts with many users and has always been abusive and disgusting.
 
ori said:
So I was one of the people banned. I don’t disagree with my ban as I reacted to someone who has been a constant thorn with abusive posts including racist, homophonic and antisemitic posts. I shouldn’t have reacted and I apologise for that. I don’t agree that the main culprit got the same ban as the 2 of us who responded.

Just in my defence. I had messaged the moderator over a year ago about this person and the reply I got “I’m staying out of it”.
Said instigator has had fallouts with many users and has always been abusive and disgusting.
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Lesson learned? Don’t bite. Set him as a Foe and disregard anything that slips through.
But can we all accept you’ve made your point and please don’t use this thread to perpetuate it.
Life is too short.
 
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