Hi Bodyboarder, very interesting reading your post - brought about a lot of deja vu!
You could do a search and read the pages of posts outlining the concerns I had - the same as you - regarding my M and in particular it's engine character. I had a 2 litre and then a 3.0si. Both were beautifully smooth and the engine in the M was a shock at first. I have some favourite roads that I couldn't enjoy in it as I was reluctant to push the engine and use the top rev range - it felt like I was mechanically abusing the engine! I was not happy and kept my 3.0si for 6 months before deciding which Zed to keep.
I would urge you to stick with it for some time and to take heed of what other M owners tell you - namely that they are all like that! Once you start to relax concerning the tappety noise and the harsh metallic howl as the revs rise, you will begin to enjoy the cars capabilities more and more. (Though you'll still find the engine intrusive at times, you'll grow to love that howl when you're 'using' it).
I bought my M because of it's looks but also because I was driving with some talented and capable drivers and I felt that the 3.0si had limits which my wife and I had met when out driving with them. We needed something with a little more capability. Now I feel that I am only using part of the M's capability rather than all of it and I'm more than certain that this has kept us safer and in at least a couple of instances has contributed in us not getting into difficulties (it is a much more effective overtaking tool, has only suffered from brake fade once (whereas the 3.0si used to suffer this quite often) and the suspension rides better and corners with far more control despite a certain amount of body movement (under acceleration and heavy braking as well). Suffice to say, my wife (who is my barometer of how safe we are on the road and has travelled thousands of miles as pillion on our previous motorbikes) states that she feels more secure in the M because of it's greater abilities (She enjoys spirited driving and has a full bike licence too!) We're talking safe but enjoyable spirited road driving here not track use.
After 6 months and lots of private messages of reassurance from other M owners and like yourself, having the M checked out by various trusted specialist mechanics, I took the plunge, kept the M and sold my 3.0si. I loved that Zed and have many happy memories of thousands of brilliant miles with it and I still miss it. It's a different kind of drive to the M but I'd still be content to own one today - fabulous car.
But I feel I own a characterful sports car now, a specialist sports car. There is some satisfaction in owning such a car (and in my case I feel very lucky to have this opportunity). It's also, for the driving I do, more capable in all areas and therefore safer on the road. I do however use it less often as, unlike the 3.0si I don't 'nip to the shops' or 'round to my mates' in it. It takes time to warm up and isn't as relaxing to drive in that role - it tends to come out only when it's worth getting it out on the road - that is - when it's going to be 'used'. It feels special owning and driving an M, it really does - well for me anyway!
There's also a certain amount of financial consideration in my choice. The M holds onto its value more than any other Zed variant (though higher servicing costs apply) and there's nothing comparable at this price point that offers the performance and value of the Z4MR (coupes £1000s more, 911/Boxsters even dearer).
There will come a time when my driving needs will change (and it's not getting any easier to enjoy your motoring) then I'll be happy to burble about in an MX5 enjoying the scenery and landscape rather than just concentrating on the road . . . .
one day.
