Ratio of women to men
- Thread starter Woots
- Start date
Bing said:
If you read back though the thread with an impartial eye, I think you may decide that the current standing is
Tom - flight leader
Woots - wingman
Peddy - Baron Von Blindside
Loving the new sig by the way Woots
[/quote]
We might let Tom come by and say hi
JaEdBa said:RubyBlueZ4MC said:
Resistance is futile Ruby; Woots, Marvin and his revolving camp-bed...it's every ladies' dream...
(Bing please note correct use of punctuation and i've even bothered with capitals this time...)
And ignore my earlier post. The Lady herself picked it back up again 8)
Bing said:Slowed down a bit this thread, so perhaps worth quoting this :
Woots said:
And asking Woots to share his findings so far
In light of my recent research into the question posed "ratio of women to men" i have made the following discoveries;
1. Ownership of the Z4 seems to stand at a 95% male to 5% female ratio, which is a lowly amount given that the ratio of male to female drives on the road today stands at a 60-40 split (as a guesstimation). The reasons for this i have concluded are the following;
Women find the z4 too harsh, mrs woots in particular holds on for dear life whenever i even drive like miss daisy, it was only yesterday that i was pullling off at a steady rate and changing up at a reasonably economic 2500 rpm when she retorted "why you doing that?....revving it like so", next up they find the boot too small, every woman likes to carry an aresnal of cosmetics in the boot, hairdryer and straighteners, lipstick, lipgloss to go over the lipstick and those pen things where you draw around ur lips, along with an array of perfumes to attract a mate.
Next reason women dont like the Z4 so much as say a honda accord is the low driving position, they feel that getting out of a low slung car while wearing a mini skirt is a rather undignified affair and attracts attention from people like Tom and other sex pests.
Whilst researching into this topic i discovered strange things about the NHS in particular;
Firstly the GP's arent how you'd imagine them, before i would have been terrified to walk into my local surgery to ask the doc to check to make sure 10 inches was a normal size for a semi flaccid Penis, however now i feel i could confidently walk in, whap it on the desk without fear of ridicule or a lowering of my social standing as a well respected serving member of HM forces and indeed a member of the british population.
Ive also learnt that the doctors might not only help in this situation but would also enjoy it, ive heared whispers of a lot of "thumb twiddling" while in the back of "on call" gp cars at what i assume is carried out when a particularly tasteful gp sees something that catches her fancy.
Doctors however do not rest even when they are out of office, even when on a social outing with the wider population they strut around in medical attire which nowdays the medical uniform consists of stockings and suspenders with white heels covered by a tighly fitted blouse and skirt. This is handy as ppl on a night out will always know where the first aid trained people are should they feel they require assistance, whatever that may be.
Next up, NEVER and i mean NEVER trust a doctor, they lure you into a false sense of security, willing you on to go that extra mile and to put in all the ground work in the hope they will show you another snap of their undergarments or whisper sweet nothings into your ears while giving you a once over. However they really are a cruel mistress, and while youre there masticating, genuflecting if you will at their latest online order from ann summers medical sex-tion the will instantaneously go off with somebody else who just happens to be passing at that moment in time, just because for example because he has a big camera. Your camera will only get you so far :evil: :evil: :evil: :wink:
Next up is that they actually have friends, yes even the medical student spent a while learning about how to carry themselves in the world outside of prescriptions, and fobbing people off with "have some paracetemol and lepsips and you'll be okay" the greatest tool in their closet is the art of seduction, how easily they snap up the most unsuspecting yet high standing individuals is almost as scary as Bing wearing a dress to a party.
To conclude, the question of "ratio of women to men" may at first seem as simple as using an apostrophe in the correct place, but as we've evaluated, there is much more than at first meets the eye...........
Prof Woots MBE
Woots said:Bing said:Slowed down a bit this thread, so perhaps worth quoting this :
Woots said:
And asking Woots to share his findings so far
In light of my recent research into the question posed "ratio of women to men" i have made the following discoveries;
1. Ownership of the Z4 seems to stand at a 95% male to 5% female ratio, which is a lowly amount given that the ratio of male to female drives on the road today stands at a 60-40 split (as a guesstimation). The reasons for this i have concluded are the following;
Women find the z4 too harsh, mrs woots in particular holds on for dear life whenever i even drive like miss daisy, it was only yesterday that i was pullling off at a steady rate and changing up at a reasonably economic 2500 rpm when she retorted "why you doing that?....revving it like so", next up they find the boot too small, every woman likes to carry an aresnal of cosmetics in the boot, hairdryer and straighteners, lipstick, lipgloss to go over the lipstick and those pen things where you draw around ur lips, along with an array of perfumes to attract a mate.
Next reason women dont like the Z4 so much as say a honda accord is the low driving position, they feel that getting out of a low slung car while wearing a mini skirt is a rather undignified affair and attracts attention from people like Tom and other sex pests.
Whilst researching into this topic i discovered strange things about the NHS in particular;
Firstly the GP's arent how you'd imagine them, before i would have been terrified to walk into my local surgery to ask the doc to check to make sure 10 inches was a normal size for a semi flaccid Penis, however now i feel i could confidently walk in, whap it on the desk without fear of ridicule or a lowering of my social standing as a well respected serving member of HM forces and indeed a member of the british population.
Ive also learnt that the doctors might not only help in this situation but would also enjoy it, ive heared whispers of a lot of "thumb twiddling" while in the back of "on call" gp cars at what i assume is carried out when a particularly tasteful gp sees something that catches her fancy.
Doctors however do not rest even when they are out of office, even when on a social outing with the wider population they strut around in medical attire which nowdays the medical uniform consists of stockings and suspenders with white heels covered by a tighly fitted blouse and skirt. This is handy as ppl on a night out will always know where the first aid trained people are should they feel they require assistance, whatever that may be.
Next up, NEVER and i mean NEVER trust a doctor, they lure you into a false sense of security, willing you on to go that extra mile and to put in all the ground work in the hope they will show you another snap of their undergarments or whisper sweet nothings into your ears while giving you a once over. However they really are a cruel mistress, and while youre there masticating, genuflecting if you will at their latest online order from ann summers medical sex-tion the will instantaneously go off with somebody else who just happens to be passing at that moment in time, just because for example because he has a big camera. Your camera will only get you so far :evil: :evil: :evil: :wink:
Next up is that they actually have friends, yes even the medical student spent a while learning about how to carry themselves in the world outside of prescriptions, and fobbing people off with "have some paracetemol and lepsips and you'll be okay" the greatest tool in their closet is the art of seduction, how easily they snap up the most unsuspecting yet high standing individuals is almost as scary as Bing wearing a dress to a party.
To conclude, the question of "ratio of women to men" may at first seem as simple as using an apostrophe in the correct place, but as we've evaluated, there is much more than at first meets the eye...........
Prof Woots MBE
Woots said:
:ROFL2:
///Mazing! Very much enjoying the conclusions you have drawn! Think that deserves a Z4 forum honoury doctorate! The one thing ALL women :heart: is a man who can express himself. Mrs Woots is one lucky lady, in more ways than one! It's not all about big cameras (although boy they help
)Keep up the good work :kiss:
:ROFL2:
///Mazing! Very much enjoying the conclusions you have drawn! Think that deserves a Z4 forum honoury doctorate! The one thing ALL women :heart: is a man who can express himself. Mrs Woots is one lucky lady, in more ways than one! It's not all about big cameras (although boy they help
Keep up the good work :kiss:
And that, gentlemen, is how you do that :wink:
Speaking of big cameras...
Tom?
Tom?
Bing said:
The force was strong with Anakin, then he turned into Darth Vader. Woots, is that Asthma, or are you turning to the dark side?