Proud to be English! (for once....)

[Ali_Z4C]

Awesome result by England and a great team effort, finally we have a team that can bat AND bowl!! Its great for the convicts to finally get a taste of what it felt like to be an England fan in the 90's.... but actually I don't think event we were bad enough to get beat by an innings in 3 tests in a 5 test series!! ha ha ha ha.....

 

[T-J]

A bloke walks into a brothel and says: "I'm a bit kinky, how much for total humiliation?"
The madam replies $60.
"Wow, what do I get for that," he says.
She says: "A baggy green cap and an Australian Cricket Shirt.

 

[bmwangler]

Great achievement by the England cricket team - we've spent too long being laughed at by the Aussies.

Just the Aussies?.....

Good point - don't think the other sides will be relishing meeting us quite so much now though.

I just hope we carry this on into the one-day series and 20-20

 

[Redzedfour]

Not a cricket fan, at last we have an England team we can be proud and well done them unlike the England football team a bunch of overpaid prima donnas with a liking for high class hookers,other players ex girlfriends. :thumbsdown:

 

[T-J]

Q: What do you call an Australian that’s good with a bat?
A: A vet

Q: What is the main function of the Australian coach?
A: To transport the team from the hotel to the ground.

Q: Which Australians have scored the most Ashes Runs?
A: The scoreboard attendants

Q: What do you call an Australian with a champagne bottle in his hand?
A: A waiter.

Q: Who spends the most time at the crease from anyone in the Australian team?
A: The attendant who ironed the cricket whites.

Q: What do you call a mediocre Cricketer with a future, irrespective of any talent or experience?
A: A New South Welshman

Q: What's the Aussie version of a hat trick?
A: Three runs in three balls.

Q: What do Aussie batsmen and drug addicts have in common?
A: Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from.

Q: What is the most proficient and productive form of footwork displayed by Australian batsmen?
A: The walk back to the pavilion.

Q: What do you call a world class Australian cricketer?
A: Retired.

Q: What do you call a Cricket Australia Member sitting in the Member's Area when Australia is bowling in a Boxing Day Test Match?
A: Lonely.

Q: What do you call an Australian who can hold a catch?
A: A fisherman.

Q: How does an opposing team get an Australian wicket for next to no runs conceded?
A: When Phil Hughes opens the batting for Australia.

Q: Who are the most frustrated players listed at No. 8 to No. 11 on a Domestic Cricket Team Sheet?
A: The rest of the NSW State Team.

Q: Which Australian has spent the most time at the wicket in the Ashes?
A: The curator using the heavy roller between innings.

Q: Why does Cricket Australia open the Test Venues for free entry on the 5th Day of a Test Match?
A: To let the public have a look in the museum.

Q: What do you call an Australian Batsman who uses sun screen?
A: An optimist.

Q: Shane Watson is an anagram for what?
A: Want no Ashes.

Q: Why don't Aussie fielders need pre-tour travel injections?
A: Because they hardly ever catch anything.

Q: What do you call an Aussie Centurion?
A: A bowler.

Q: What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet after eating a dodgy 4 & Twenty Meat Pie?
A: The entire Australian innings.