On buying your kid a smartphone

Stuart Truman

Lifer
 The Cotswolds
I saw this "contract" between a mum and her son when gifting him an iPhone for Xmas. Well thought out so I thought I'd share...

Dear Gregory

Merry Christmas! You are now the proud owner of an iPhone. Hot Damn! You are a good & responsible 13 year old boy and you deserve this gift. But with the acceptance of this present comes rules and regulations. Please read through the following contract. I hope that you understand it is my job to raise you into a well rounded, healthy young man that can function in the world and coexist with technology, not be ruled by it. Failure to comply with the following list will result in termination of your iPhone ownership.

I love you madly & look forward to sharing several million text messages with you in the days to come.

1. It is my phone. I bought it. I pay for it. I am loaning it to you. Aren’t I the greatest?

2. I will always know the password.

3. If it rings, answer it. It is a phone. Say hello, use your manners. Do not ever ignore a phone call if the screen reads “Mom” or “Dad”. Not ever.

4. Hand the phone to one of your parents promptly at 7:30pm every school night & every weekend night at 9:00pm. It will be shut off for the night and turned on again at 7:30am. If you would not make a call to someone’s land line, wherein their parents may answer first, then do not call or text. Listen to those instincts and respect other families like we would like to be respected.

5. It does not go to school with you. Have a conversation with the people you text in person. It’s a life skill. *Half days, field trips and after school activities will require special consideration.

6. If it falls into the toilet, smashes on the ground, or vanishes into thin air, you are responsible for the replacement costs or repairs. Mow a lawn, babysit, stash some birthday money. It will happen, you should be prepared.

7. Do not use this technology to lie, fool, or deceive another human being. Do not involve yourself in conversations that are hurtful to others. Be a good friend first or stay the hell out of the crossfire.

8. Do not text, email, or say anything through this device you would not say in person.

9. Do not text, email, or say anything to someone that you would not say out loud with their parents in the room. Censor yourself.

10. No porn. Search the web for information you would openly share with me. If you have a question about anything, ask a person – preferably me or your father.

11. Turn it off, silence it, put it away in public. Especially in a restaurant, at the movies, or while speaking with another human being. You are not a rude person; do not allow the iPhone to change that.

12. Do not send or receive pictures of your private parts or anyone else’s private parts. Don’t laugh. Someday you will be tempted to do this despite your high intelligence. It is risky and could ruin your teenage/college/adult life. It is always a bad idea. Cyberspace is vast and more powerful than you. And it is hard to make anything of this magnitude disappear – including a bad reputation.

13. Don’t take a zillion pictures and videos. There is no need to document everything. Live your experiences. They will be stored in your memory for eternity.

14. Leave your phone home sometimes and feel safe and secure in that decision. It is not alive or an extension of you. Learn to live without it. Be bigger and more powerful than FOMO – fear of missing out.

15. Download music that is new or classic or different than the millions of your peers that listen to the same exact stuff. Your generation has access to music like never before in history. Take advantage of that gift. Expand your horizons.

16. Play a game with words or puzzles or brain teasers every now and then.

17. Keep your eyes up. See the world happening around you. Stare out a window. Listen to the birds. Take a walk. Talk to a stranger. Wonder without googling.

18. You will mess up. I will take away your phone. We will sit down and talk about it. We will start over again. You & I, we are always learning. I am on your team. We are in this together.

It is my hope that you can agree to these terms. Most of the lessons listed here do not just apply to the iPhone, but to life. You are growing up in a fast and ever changing world. It is exciting and enticing. Keep it simple every chance you get. Trust your powerful mind and giant heart above any machine. I love you. I hope you enjoy your awesome new iPhone. Merry Christmas!
 
Liam-O said:
I'd give it back and buy my own phone...

That would always be an option, but at 13, no contract and I doubt you'd find several hundred quid to buy your own iPhone. Plus parents need to allow access to home wifi etc etc
 
I'd rather a Nokia 3310 than those restrictions. She's taken all of the fun out of the iPhone. 7:30-7:30 but your at school 7:30-4:00. So you get to use your phone 4-7:30 when your at home and have a computer anyway...
 
The point is kids (and many adults too) spend too much time online (let's pause for a moment of ironic introspection here) and don't actually communicate with people

Nice group idea I saw, when you go out for dinner everyone puts their phones on the table in a pile. The first one to check their phone pays the bill
 
The future isn't bright and it certainly isn't orange. It's dark, sort of muddy grey and has people staring at their own hands not talking to each other.

I miss the days of being uncontactable.
 
inkey$ said:
The future isn't bright and it certainly isn't orange. It's dark, sort of muddy grey and has people staring at their own hands not talking to each other.

I miss the days of being uncontactable.

Agree totally with you inkey$. And I did have a moment of ironic introspection :lol:

I love this contract, though I might be tempted to modify it slightly. Mrs Bing will be due for an upgrade in July, so I am thinking of giving her iPhone 4 to Wee Bing... This will come in handy, cheers Stu :thumbsup:
 
inkey$ said:
The future isn't bright and it certainly isn't orange. It's dark, sort of muddy grey and has people staring at their own hands not talking to each other.

I miss the days of being uncontactable.

I've heard it said that when I was just a few minutes old. The doctor cut the umbilical cord. Why would I want to reattach it in the form of a cell phone.

I personally haven't seen my pre pay cell in about 4 months. The wife said it's in a certain catch all drawer. but I haven't bothered to check.
 
I have lost count of the number of times I have gone into a restaurant or pub and witnessed whole tables of diners sat silently ignoring each other whilst staring at their phones. It really kills the atmosphere in some of these places.

Why bother going out?

I presume they are checking their farcebooks, but I do feel like going up to them and asking them if they are texting each other because they have lost the power of speech.

I like the thinking behind the contract but not convinced it would ever work in practice.
 
I'd break that contract in several areas myself - rule 4, 10 and 11.

Whenever my gf is at home we would text, facetime well after 12, wouldnt dream of calling the landline as her folks would be sleeping.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Stuart Truman said:
Nice group idea I saw, when you go out for dinner everyone puts their phones on the table in a pile. The first one to check their phone pays the bill

I like that :thumbsup:
 
Think I need to pass this on to my sister. She got her 10 year old daughter a blackberry on contract along with a whole load of other expensive, inappropriate stuff for a child of her age. She's been glued to that and her iPod since Christmas Day and now seems to think it's perfectly acceptable to be ignorant and rude to everyone. Desperate to be a teenager but if either of my kids act like that before they actually are teenagers then they'll be feeling the back of my hand.

* being ignorant and rude is part of being a teenager so it's allowed then.
 
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