Nationwide Gang Targets Z4 Forum Cars

R

RickRob

Veteran
 Ifold, West Sussex
A couple of weeks ago Mr Tidy posted the following picture:



At the time it appeared to have been an accident, but I now have reason to believe that this was an ill-fated attempt by the pheasant to steal the whole of the front end of Mr Tidy's coupe. Realising that trying to steal the whole of the front end is quite difficult, this gang are now targeting smaller parts.

Driving home tonight a pheasant leapt out of a hedge and cleanly removed the left-hand grill from my ///M Roadster. Indeed the removal was so clean and quick one wonders if this gang has been reading Forum "how to" posts.

However, proving that they are the stupidest birds, this one then dropped the grill. This was actually quite a risky operation on the pheasant's part as I was doing 40 mph (on a 60 mph road) and matters didn't improve when the grill was dropped under my wheels. As you may imagine, that didn't do the grill any favours.

So, as you may have anticipated by now, I am in need of another left-hand grill - matt black with chrome surround. In order to provoke sympathy and to show which side is left (there was some confusion in a recent thread), I am attaching the "after" photo:

4B3798B7-9CEA-4CB2-B2CD-AC7F59DC7109_zpsbltm4wsw.jpg

Anyone able to assist? Happy to pay in either good money or pheasant!

Thanks for reading!!
 
OOPs, best I've had is a pigeon just missing the windscreen, and a sparrow [yes only a sparrow] destroying my M3 grills and the radiator - so think yourself lucky :)

meanwhile, it has to be said................

I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's son
I'm only plucking pheasants 'till the pheasant plucker comes.

Me husband is a keeper, he's a very busy man
I try to understand him and I help him all I can,
But sometimes in an evening I feel a trifle dim
All alone, I'm plucking pheasants, when I'd rather pluck with him.

I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's mate
I'm only plucking pheasants 'cos the pheasant plucker's late !

I'm not good at plucking pheasants, at pheasant plucking I get stuck
Though some pheasants find it pleasant I'd rather pluck a duck.
Oh plucking geese is gorgeous, I can pluck a goose with ease
But pheasant plucking's torture because they haven't any grease.

I'm not a pheasant plucker, he has gone out on the tiles
He only plucked one pheasant and I'm sitting here with piles !

You have to pluck them fresh, if it’s fresh they’re not unpleasant,
I knew a man in Dunstable who could pluck a frozen pheasant.
They say the village constable had pheasant plucking sessions
With the vicar on a Sunday ‘tween the first and second lessons.

I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's mum
I'm only plucking pheasants 'till the pheasant plucker's come.

My good friend Godfrey is most adept, he's really got the knack
He likes to have a pheasant plucked before he hits the sack.
I like to give a helping hand, I gather up the feathers,
It's really all our pheasant plucking keeps us pair together.

I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's friend
I'm only plucking pheasants as a means unto an end !

My husband's in the forest always banging with his gun
If he could hear me half the time I'm sure that he would run,
For there's fluff in all my crannies, there's feathers up my nose
And I'm itching in the kitchen from my head down to my toes.

I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's wife
And when we pluck together it's a pheasant plucking life !

:rofl: :driving:
 
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