Life

M

Machine monkey

Lifer
 In the shire Oxfordshire
Bloody difficult at times!! Me + the wife aka mrs monkey great!! ok jobs a house we love! 2 beautiful cats :) no kids but hopefully that could be an idea soon. My mum causes me problems though!! Won't go in to all the details but it's just been her 60th I took her away for a weekend. Organised a small family get together spent more than my mortgage on her! And I don't feel like I have made her happy?!?? Wtf what dose a son need to do???
 
Life can be frustrating at times and challenging when it comes to family, we all have them and have our ups and downs. Sorry to hear of your woes fella :(
 
You can only do what you can. Seems as though you did a lot! You need to have your life with Mrs Monkey. You can't keep all of the people happy all of the time. Commiserations - hope things get better.
 
Has she said she is not happy or is that just your evaluation?

Depends on the circumstances but I would not waste any time and more importantly money on anyone who doesn't appreciate your efforts. Mother or not..!!

If you have a massive amount of time, I can give you the details of a problem mother.
 
Don't be so hard on yourself, sometimes parents can take you for granted and don't show their appreciation but underneath its totally the opposite. Take my mum, she's 85, and for the want of a better word my 2nd job, she won't accept any outside help except mine and refuses to go into a home which I can't say I blame her. It runs me ragged when working during the day. But when I heard her on the phone to a relative the other day about how she couldn't cope without me it made me realise how appreciative she is.

Tim.
 
Don't beat yourself up Mat , maybe she's getting twitched cause your'e heading off on holiday ?
just be content in the knowledge that you are doing right & continue to do so .
It's the circle of life & as many get older they become more like infants in the need for more time & attention :thumbsup:
 
As they say you can't choose your family but ........... I wish I still had my mum here with me. :(

Hang in there mate - you did your best - you only have one mum.
 
Thanks all for the time comments and help :thumbsup:

Harvard I think we need yo sit down. Drink away the national debt of a small-medium size county !! And off load some sh1t!!

Tbh since my dad past away I have had to have wider shoulders. But my mum has been a pita all my life!! God I just wish my life was normal..... (Wtf is normal!!)
 
I thought that was just in the dna of parents, you can't never do enough, it's what pushes you out of home and drives you onwards, well at least until you get married anyway, but that's a whole other thread...

As others said don't be so hard on yourself, still time for a Sunday night beer
 
All you can do is your best - if that aint good enough for your Mum - to be brutally frank - forget about trying to please her and concentrate on your own family :).

ps Stick with cats - if you think parents can be a pita just wait for the s**t kids can dish out !!!!!!

Have a beer :D
 
Your life is normal MM. . . . 'It tells you more about them than it does about you' and somewhere there will be a reason for your mum's reactions. It's hard to bear but however hard it is, it doesn't have to determine your response (As your marriage, love of cats and the brilliant support you put into this forum show - hence your lovely arrangement to celebrate your mum's 60th).

Damned hard to ignore though :cry:
 
Ghengis says chill out and have that beer :)

IMG_0019_zps551bca3d.jpg
 
Machine monkey said:
Thanks all for the time comments and help :thumbsup:

Harvard I think we need yo sit down. Drink away the national debt of a small-medium size county !! And off load some sh1t!!

Tbh since my dad past away I have had to have wider shoulders. But my mum has been a pita all my life!! God I just wish my life was normal..... (Wtf is normal!!)
Click to expand...

It's Havard btw.... :D

As I said, I don't know the details but many a person I know have had a problem mother. A lot of my resentment comes from the fact that I could never give up and abandon my kids but that is what my mum did with me at about 14/15 years of age.

No matter how bad things are, you can't turn your back on your kids. I have three and there is nothing I wouldn't do to ensure they get the best start in life. Once you become an parent, your own issues have got to be secondary.

Close to the issue Monkey? Spoke to my mum after 10 months this week btw... :headbang: She said that she hadn't been feeling well and hadn't returned my calls since March.

H.
 
I feel for you Mat but unfortunately, parents can be like that at times. It's not that they don't know what you've done but find it difficult showing that appreciation.

Hang in there buddy and just keep being a good son. :thumbsup:
 
Hey guys, let's get the balance here....

I wish I could have my mum here to give me problems. I lost her eight years ago and miss her like hell.

Matt, you are a great son and she will always appreciate you but may never show it.

Just love her like a mother and enjoy your time with her.

:(
 
Nelly Welly said:
Hey guys, let's get the balance here....

I wish I could have my mum here to give me problems. I lost her eight years ago and miss her like hell.

Matt, you are a great son and she will always appreciate you but may never show it.

Just love her like a mother and enjoy your time with her.

:(
Click to expand...

Didn't mean to make it sound like we're parent bashing, I'm in the same boat as you but with both parents... Just saying there none more complex than family relationships...
 
Mums is mums. They look after you. Sounds selfish, but it how life is. I still let my mother pay for dinner when she comes to visit us, or if we meet up for lunch when I'm passing on Business.

Did make a massive fuss of her for her 75th, which was appreciated, I think and for once me and my two sisters picked up the tab. :wink:
 
Man up! Only kidding, I think you are doing a great job there. Have you asked your mum what she wants. When my dad passed away, mum asked me to call her every day. So I did. It's what she wanted, we had nothing to say, the calls were sometimes short, but it made her happy. It might be a little thing that she hankers for.
 
Nelly Welly said:
Hey guys, let's get the balance here....

I wish I could have my mum here to give me problems. I lost her eight years ago and miss her like hell.

Matt, you are a great son and she will always appreciate you but may never show it.

Just love her like a mother and enjoy your time with her.

:(
Click to expand...

Sorry to hear of your loss and I suppose that puts things in perspective.

That is part of my frustration though Nelly. I know a day will come when she is no longer with us and considering I have a family, I want her to spend more time with us. Time is such a precious commodity compared to money. Taken me 40 years to realise that..!!

H.
 
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