A
Anonymous
Guest
I realised I was dyslexic when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat
Cats have nine lives. Which makes them ideal for experimentation.
The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to arm
bears.
My dad is Irish and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most
of our family holidays in Customs.
The dodo died. Then Dodi died, Di died and Dando died. Dido must be
sh*tting herself.
My parents are from Glasgow which means they're incredibly hard, but I
was never smacked as a child... well maybe one or two grams to get me
to sleep at night.
Is it fair to say that there'd be less litter in Britain if blind
people were given pointed sticks?
My mum and dad are Scottish but they moved down to Wolverhampton when I
was two, 'cause they wanted me to sound like a tw*t.
You have to remember all the trivia that your girlfriend tells you,
because eventually you get tested. She'll go: "What's my favourite
flower?" And you murmur to yourself: "Sh*t, I wasn't listening...
Self-raising?"
The world is a dangerous place; only yesterday I went into Boots and
punched someone in the face.
I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought
the obvious one was "Shout For help"
I went out with an Irish Catholic. Very frustrating. You can take the
Girl out of Cork...
Got a phone call today to do a gig at a fire station. Went along.
Turned out it was a bloody hoax.
Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a
winner and a loser at the same time.
If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel,
then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They're
trained for that.
Cats have nine lives. Which makes them ideal for experimentation.
The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to arm
bears.
My dad is Irish and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most
of our family holidays in Customs.
The dodo died. Then Dodi died, Di died and Dando died. Dido must be
sh*tting herself.
My parents are from Glasgow which means they're incredibly hard, but I
was never smacked as a child... well maybe one or two grams to get me
to sleep at night.
Is it fair to say that there'd be less litter in Britain if blind
people were given pointed sticks?
My mum and dad are Scottish but they moved down to Wolverhampton when I
was two, 'cause they wanted me to sound like a tw*t.
You have to remember all the trivia that your girlfriend tells you,
because eventually you get tested. She'll go: "What's my favourite
flower?" And you murmur to yourself: "Sh*t, I wasn't listening...
Self-raising?"
The world is a dangerous place; only yesterday I went into Boots and
punched someone in the face.
I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought
the obvious one was "Shout For help"
I went out with an Irish Catholic. Very frustrating. You can take the
Girl out of Cork...
Got a phone call today to do a gig at a fire station. Went along.
Turned out it was a bloody hoax.
Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a
winner and a loser at the same time.
If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel,
then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They're
trained for that.
