Foster care

S

si-forks

Veteran
Are there any foster carers on the forum or anyone who know a foster carer?
For the last few years my wife and I have been considering becoming foster carers, this is not a decision that we would take lightly, my wife has worked in children's services for 25 years and is currently a family support worker for Worcestershire County Council. We both have experience at working with young adults and have hosted international students long term (a year at a time) for many years now so are used to having teenagers around all the time
My recent news of my impending redundancy has pushed our hand a little whether we should go the next step into foster care, we've both just completed the first part of our training 'skills to Foster course'
The local authority are very keen for us to go forward!! because of our skill sets and background.
My wife would continue to work and I would be the main carer this doesn't phase me in the slightest and would be a role that I would enjoy.
The only problem is financially it's an absolute disaster I just don't know how people manage to do it
Any and all advice would be most welcome
 
Very commendable thing you're thinking of doing and anything that gives these kids another crack at normality and their childhood back is definitely worth it.

I was under the impression that the government paid foster carers and that it wasn't exactly peanuts. I could be wrong though....

My cousin's brother in law is a foster carer to two boys. The oldest is no longer in foster care as he's 18 now but still lives with them and is very much part of the family. It's awesome to see how well he has turned out.

How old will the kids be? Is it not possible to get a part time job to supplement the income whilst the kids are at school?
 
A friend of mine and his wife applied to be foster carers with their Local Authority last year. They went through all the vetting process etc however to me from an outsider looking in it all seemed very one sided. My friend and his wife were given very little information as to the childs family background etc whom they would be fostering so they would at least know what to expect, I don't know if that is the norm not to give out a childs background. Anyways they ended up with an 8 year old lad and whilst it started off OK it soon spiraled into all sorts of stress and problems within the family, child running away, being disruptive and voilent towards family members. The Local Authority offered practically little or no support and acted very much like you have the child now so get on with it. They tried their best but it got to the point where they couldn't cope with the lad. I'm not trying to put you off, far from it but I would try and find out if possible all you can about the child you will be fostering. At least fostering is a little different from adopting.

Tim.
 
My wife and I work full time and we have also been foster carers since 2009. We fostered a girl for 7 years who is now 19 and has just left care. We also fostered a teenage boy for 2 years until he changed placement. Additionally we have had several 'emergency' and 'respite' placements over the years.
I would thoroughly recommend it BUT you must not be naive and expect it to be easy. All these kids are 'damaged' and all 'carry some baggage' with them. The thing to remember is it isn't their fault, they didn't choose to go into care. Oh I could write a book I tell you ! It is the biggest roller - coaster ride you can imagine but ultimately it will fulfil your life like nothing else. My wife says it is now what defines us....and that's good. We are with The National Fostering Agency and although it may seem a little mercenary they do pay us well. We are waiting for another child to be placed with us soon....I think that says alot.
If you go into it without blinkers and without prejudice you will find it tremendously rewarding.
 
Thanks guys for the advice
Things are on hold for a little bit at the moment just received our paperwork to fill in for references and medical history etc before we go to panel
Another one of our concerns is because of my wife's job history EG working in children's homes social worker family support that the council will be giving us some of their most damaged and destructive children
Tim:
as for background Worcestershire County Council seem to be pretty good at giving you a social worker assessment on the children that you're having and you do have the option not to take them if you feel you couldn't cope

Financially I know we would better off going with a private Foster agencies rather than County Council but again the issues is with the children that we would get through private fostering when they look at my wife's CV
 
si-forks said:
Thanks guys for the advice
Things are on hold for a little bit at the moment just received our paperwork to fill in for references and medical history etc before we go to panel
Another one of our concerns is because of my wife's job history EG working in children's homes social worker family support that the council will be giving us some of their most damaged and destructive children
Tim:
as for background Worcestershire County Council seem to be pretty good at giving you a social worker assessment on the children that you're having and you do have the option not to take them if you feel you couldn't cope

Financially I know we would better off going with a private Foster agencies rather than County Council but again the issues is with the children that we would get through private fostering when they look at my wife's CV
Click to expand...

Thats great if they do :thumbsup: For many fosterers, taking on a problem child is all part of it and the satisfaction gained in giving them a better life and hopefully on the right track for life. I think my friends went in slightly blinkered with some naivity, thinking it would be plain sailing.

Tim.
 
I fully agree with you Tim and it is something that you shouldn't go into it without a lot of preparation and research
 
patriot66 said:
My wife and I work full time and we have also been foster carers since 2009. We fostered a girl for 7 years who is now 19 and has just left care. We also fostered a teenage boy for 2 years until he changed placement. Additionally we have had several 'emergency' and 'respite' placements over the years.
I would thoroughly recommend it BUT you must not be naive and expect it to be easy. All these kids are 'damaged' and all 'carry some baggage' with them. The thing to remember is it isn't their fault, they didn't choose to go into care. Oh I could write a book I tell you ! It is the biggest roller - coaster ride you can imagine but ultimately it will fulfil your life like nothing else. My wife says it is now what defines us....and that's good. We are with The National Fostering Agency and although it may seem a little mercenary they do pay us well. We are waiting for another child to be placed with us soon....I think that says alot.
If you go into it without blinkers and without prejudice you will find it tremendously rewarding.
Click to expand...
Thank you for taking the time to post patriot66 nice to hear some positive feedback about foster care the local council have actively been pursuing us for the last couple of years!!
We've talked to a lot of foster carers and as I said already started some of our training
So any advice you can give is most welcome
 
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