HELP!! E89 Park Sensor - Help I'm stuck in France!!

sgreen503 · Post by **sgreen503** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 11:08 am

So, the car is back!
We've had estimates between 175 (PVR) and 2000 euros (Raymond.Harper lol)
And the winner is.... PVR!!! Who just pipped Mr Tidy at the post by 3 euros!!!
The total cost was 211 Euros.

I've worked out I should have covered around 5,000km if the journey went well.
I'll do 400km lol. From Calais to Rouen and back. Blimey.

So, administrators please use this thread as a guide to anyone wanting to go abroad, or even on a long drive as to what NOT to do. I don't mind holding myself up as an example of blind stupidity if it helps anyone else.
And while I'm here, can I request an honorary star for possibly having the longest thread going ever? Or just for the stress and money I've spent when it could have been avoided by using a £10 multimeter. I think I deserve it.

So, Calais awaits. Thank you to everyone who's been on this (sort of) journey none journey, and thanks for all the posts, some helpful, some funny, some just downright xenophobic!! (but always in a tongue and cheek way) Yes I'm talking about you Spaldinski hahaha!

All the best, Steve

Pondrew · Post by **Pondrew** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 11:28 am

sgreen503 wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 10:43 am Ah you must be one of the Polish contingent

No, I'm 100% English. Just come from down South originally.

ekimj10 · Post by **ekimj10** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 11:48 am

Probably the most interesting, intriguing tale of woe I've read in a long time., but a highly entertaining read!
Well done Forum.

MikeyH · Post by **MikeyH** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:18 pm

The end of a very enjoyable tale of trouble, I'm looking forward to your next trip to Europe.

RobbiZ4 · Post by **RobbiZ4** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:21 pm

RobbiZ4 wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:21 pm
sgreen503 wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 11:08 am So, the car is back!
[...]when it could have been avoided by using a £10 multimeter.
... as written on page 5:
RobbiZ4 wrote: ↑Thu Nov 16, 2023 10:36 am A cheap multimeter could support you.

But beleive me, even me doesn't carry one in my Z4 on each trip.

RobbiZ4 · Post by **RobbiZ4** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:22 pm

sgreen503 · Post by **sgreen503** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:30 pm

Pondrew wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 11:28 am
sgreen503 wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 10:43 am Ah you must be one of the Polish contingent
No, I'm 100% English. Just come from down South originally.

Ah my mistake apologies, me too. Parents thought it was a good idea to up sticks from Uxbridge 35 years ago. Not sure the old dear would agree with that now...

sgreen503 · Post by **sgreen503** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:33 pm

MikeyH wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:18 pm The end of a very enjoyable tale of trouble, I'm looking forward to your next trip to Europe.

Thanks mate, I'm thinking of getting the ferry to Santander next summer, picking up the same mate in Madrid, and heading to Morocco. I'm not joking.
I'll be back!!!!!

RobbiZ4 · Post by **RobbiZ4** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:34 pm

sgreen503 wrote: ↑Wed Nov 29, 2023 9:36 pm
4) So, according to BMW the cause of all this was a completely flat battery. And despite me changing it for a new one, by that point it needed a complete software reset.

Let's summarize:
My initial idea by replacing your 2009 EMF module with my EMF module should have worked on your car. Everything else could have been solved by me in the hotel garage.

The following activities could have been saved:

sgreen503 wrote: ↑Wed Nov 29, 2023 10:45 pm 150 - New Battery
180 - Locksmith to get into the car
160 - Top of the range jump pack
280 - Recovery from hotel car park to BMW (10 min journey)
460 - Car hire
211 - BMW Software update service
??? - a big tip for the hotel guy who supported you all the days in Rouen

In total: 1.441€++ plus 2 additional nights in Rouen.

I couldn't have prevented that:

sgreen503 wrote: ↑Wed Nov 29, 2023 10:45 pm 130 - Wheel clamp removal (although to be fair the Z4 would have gotten the same treatment from the lovely guys at Lisbon Council)

sgreen503 · Post by **sgreen503** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 1:08 pm

RobbiZ4 wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 12:34 pm
sgreen503 wrote: ↑Wed Nov 29, 2023 9:36 pm
4) So, according to BMW the cause of all this was a completely flat battery. And despite me changing it for a new one, by that point it needed a complete software reset.
Let's summarize:
My initial idea by replacing your 2009 EMF modul with my EMF module should have worked on your car. Everything else could have been solved by me in the hotel garage.

The following activities could have been saved:
sgreen503 wrote: ↑Wed Nov 29, 2023 10:45 pm 150 - New Battery
180 - Locksmith to get into the car
160 - Top of the range jump pack
280 - Recovery from hotel car park to BMW (10 min journey)
460 - Car hire
211 - BMW Software update service
??? - a big tip for the hotel guy who supported you all the days in Rouen
In total: 1.441€++ plus 2 additional nights in Rouen.

I couldn't have prevented that:
sgreen503 wrote: ↑Wed Nov 29, 2023 10:45 pm 130 - Wheel clamp removal (although to be fair the Z4 would have gotten the same treatment from the lovely guys at Lisbon Council)

Ok clever cloggs you win.

RobbiZ4 · Post by **RobbiZ4** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 1:10 pm

sgreen503 wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 1:08 pm Ok clever cloggs you win.

We'll meet on your next trip.

pvr · Post by **pvr** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 1:15 pm

How could you prevent the battery replacement cost from that list though? Isn't that a required cost in any case as the old one was dead?

As I won, could I request the award ceremony to be held down south as there is no way I go up to Pondrew country for that

Scubaregs · Post by **Scubaregs** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 2:09 pm

pvr wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 1:15 pm How could you prevent the battery replacement cost from that list though? Isn't that a required cost in any case as the old one was dead?

As I won, could I request the award ceremony to be held down south as there is no way I go up to Pondrew country for that

Apologies, the reward IS a trip to Pondrew's. Well done.

pvr · Post by **pvr** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 2:20 pm

I haven’t accepted the award yet

Scubaregs · Post by **Scubaregs** » Thu Nov 30, 2023 2:44 pm

pvr wrote: ↑Thu Nov 30, 2023 2:20 pm I haven’t accepted the award yet

Non negotiable I'm afraid, didn't you read the t&c's?

Anyway, you are booked in for tonight, arrival time is 23.55, that's the bad news.

Good news is checkout is 00.05.

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