Need a chuckle? Read this......

chasBMW · Post by **chasBMW** » Wed May 16, 2018 1:12 pm

When I had the 35is I was driving to my sisters one sunday nice day roof down music on then sploosh a gallon of the stuff hit my windscreen which the wipers & screenwash did little to shift which meant driving by the force and it did occur to me that if it had been another second later it would have been inside with me , have always been mildly apprehensive since. The Porsche has a fabric roof and even ordinary bird poop is hard to remove

jack07 · Post by **jack07** » Wed May 16, 2018 1:23 pm

Defo one up for the coupe

bbrys · Post by **bbrys** » Wed May 16, 2018 2:17 pm

OMG, I have my Z only for 10 days but I knew from the beginning that it's a good idea to always have a little pack of wet wipes in the glove box

Paulwirral · Post by **Paulwirral** » Wed May 16, 2018 3:13 pm

I sympathise with you , a couple of weeks ago we walked up into Liverpool to do some shopping and my missus got hit on her arm and shoulder , she thought someone had slapped her and ran off at first until she saw the true horror sliding down her arm , didn't help much that my comment was " it could have been a lot worse , it could have hit me "

I've still not worked out why she stopped speaking to me for the rest of the day

Player 1 · Post by **Player 1** » Wed May 16, 2018 5:31 pm

The stories in this thread certainly have made me chuckle!

Later last year I was driving up the lane home one night when we heard a loud thud on the roof, it was dark and the trees that grow by the side of the lane drop bits all the time so didn't think much of it. It was only in the morning when I came to the car I found it to be the most colossal bird turd that had hit the roof, gone all down the back window, across the boot lid and down the bumper! First point of impact was directly above the passenger seat where my girlfriend had been sitting that evening beforehand having insisted she didn't want the roof down because it was too cold

It didn't seem prudent to allow her to think she could've been right so I quickly cleaned it all off, chuckling to myself thinking about what might've been

wilwong1971 · Post by **wilwong1971** » Wed May 16, 2018 7:03 pm

I feel your pain, my emoji poo was strangely appropaite, damn thing went from tip of my grille up and over to the boot .. freshly waxed the day before too!

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firebobby · Post by **firebobby** » Wed May 16, 2018 8:44 pm

What are they feeding this b4stards

Mr Tidy · Post by **Mr Tidy** » Wed May 16, 2018 11:01 pm

jack07 wrote: ↑Wed May 16, 2018 1:23 pm Defo one up for the coupe

+1.

buzyg · Post by **buzyg** » Thu May 17, 2018 12:28 am

F%%king hate em. Had three loads in 30 mins once trying to leave work. Plop stop clean plop stop clean plop, finally I had to drive home, as the gates where about to be locked.

ihadablackdog · Post by **ihadablackdog** » Thu May 17, 2018 9:31 am

Thanks for this....on my drive into work this morning with the roof down, everytime I saw a bird I got paranoid I was going to be sh1t on from a great height!

step_change · Post by **step_change** » Thu May 17, 2018 3:24 pm

Seagulls are evil vermin. Love animals and birds generally but those f*****g things? Cull the lot of them.

step_change · Post by **step_change** » Thu May 17, 2018 3:26 pm

... and whatever you do don't scrub the stuff off, you'll wreck the clear coat.... Leave a wet sponge or paper towel on it for at least 30 mins before hosing it off.

Action Jackson · Post by **Action Jackson** » Thu May 17, 2018 7:29 pm

got home on break the other day, was amazing outside, thought i'd leave the roof down, come back 40 mins later to bird s**t bang in the middle of my headrest! Luckily no explosion spread though!

Nanu · Post by **Nanu** » Thu May 17, 2018 7:50 pm

Many moons ago I used to work in South Shields and car was parked overnight near Ocean Road. For those that don't know the place,
Ocean Road has what is most likely the densest population of curry shops anywhere. Try removing seagull s**t when it's been feasting in the bins at the back of these shops all night. No pleasant to say the least

buzyg · Post by **buzyg** » Fri May 18, 2018 12:30 am

step_change wrote: ↑Thu May 17, 2018 3:26 pm ... and whatever you do don't scrub the stuff off, you'll wreck the clear coat.... Leave a wet sponge or paper towel on it for at least 30 mins before hosing it off.

Sound advice.

I also carry bird wipes and water in the boot.

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